The Roomba Factor

Of all the silly things Tim and I registered for during our engagement, the Roomba was definitely something we didn't really think we would get. I'll admit, I watched the infomercial about 100 times and I loved it. Plus, I'm a little lazy sometimes and HATE to run the vacuum, so I thought it would be perfect.

We didn't really expect to actually get a Roomba, though. It was one of those heck, why not, kind of registry choices.

So when we opened the box from my step-mom and her family, Tim & I literally cracked up. It was the Roomba! I waited a couple weeks (mostly until you could see the floor) and then tried it out. I'll admit, I actually laughed out loud the first time I used it. And yes, I do use the silly thing. I love it, actually. Take this last Monday, for instance. Tim and I went to the gym. We came home. I needed to shower and the floors were in dire need of some attention. So, what's a girl to do? I hit the clean button and went upstairs. Tim did some work in his office, and the little vacuum that could just did it's job. it runs into walls, backs up, and does it's thing. Awhile later it's done and goes back to the base to recharge and get ready for the next time we need it!

What can I say? It's fun, it's easy, and it sure helps me look like a better housekeeper than I actually am :)

Anyway

Confession: Once I get songs stuck in my head, they tend to stay there for a VERY long time. Case in point - I have had the song "Anyway" by Martina McBride in my head for about 2 months. Sometimes it goes away for a few days, but as soon as I hear any part of it, it's back. In case you don't know what I'm talking about, here are the lyrics:

You can spend your whole life building
Something from nothin'
One storm can come and blow it all away
Build it anyway

You can chase a dream
That seems so out of reach
And you know it might not ever come your way
Dream it anyway

God is great
But sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyway

This world's gone crazy
It's hard to believe
That tomorrow will be better than today
Believe it anyway

You can love someone with all your heart
For all the right reasons
In a moment they can choose to walk away
Love 'em anyway

God is great
But sometimes life ain't good
And when I pray
It doesn't always turn out like I think it should
But I do it anyway
I do it anyways

You can pour your soul out singing
A song you believe in
That tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang
Sing it anyway
Yea - sing it anyway

I sing
I dream
I love
Anyway

It's amazing how much this song speaks to my heart and of my walk with God. I know that there are times in my life when it's so hard to see the goodness of God through the darkness of the world. People I love get sick. A friend disappoints. People disappear. Life gets complicated. The simplicity I so love gets farther and farther away. The black and white becomes shades of gray. Knowing that there is a lot of heartache and struggles going on in the world - knowing that people struggle to even make it through the day sometimes - I have found immense comfort in this song.

To me, it's more than just a song about prayer. It's a song about living your life and living your heart, and doing it anyway! Things will fail, dreams will be shattered, people will disappoint, life will be disrupted by things that are completely out of our control. And, when it happens, we have a choice - we can choose to dream even if those dreams may never come true; we can choose to love even if it means we can be hurt; we can live the best life possible even if we know that the world is going to disappoint.

God is great, but sometimes life ain't good...

untitled

I just spent a good solid two minutes trying to think of a title for this blog. I am going to just leave it untitled. If it's that hard to find one, maybe it doesn't need one!

Life is moving along at a steady pace. I spent all of last week at a convention in Chattanooga. The convention was good, but getting to spend time with a couple of coworkers that I didn't know well and get to know them was more important to me. I spend a lot of my time at work sequestered in my own little world upstairs. I pile up the projects, requests, and deadlines and get to pretty much separate myself from all the goings-on downstairs. That's good, most of the time, but I also know that I miss out on a lot being up here. Anyway, the point is, getting to know the two women I went with - getting to know their stories and their lives and their frustrations and their celebrations - that was important and very good.

Since the convention I have been super busy. Work is picking up. We're launching some new publications & communications stuff, I have to do the 2007 directory and then just my general job duties and craziness. It's going to be a couple more crazy months, too, I think. I am looking forward to some of the new challenges, and hoping that everything settles into a place that fits soon. I have been struggling with my job satisfaction a little lately - the day in day out same old everything stuff that hasn't really changed for a year - but I think those days are coming to a close. Now it's just going to be trying to balance work, my other jobs, my marriage, and spending time with friends and family. I know we don't have plans to GO anywhere, but I think I'll have to take a couple days off this summer just to rest and relax and recuperate.

Okay, I have tried twice to add more to this, but it keeps disappearing, so i'm done for now!

Something Deeper

we must be lonely side by side
it's a perfect way to hide

- Spamalot -

Although Spamalot was nothing more than a couple hours of fun with no depth attached, there was one moment that caught me off guard and stuck with me through the last portion of the show. As King Arthur is bemoaning the current state of his life, he sings a song called "I'm All Alone" (even though he's not). Toward the end of the song, he sings the above line...and for a moment my mind went crazy. How true is that of where we really are in life these days?

I know I've talked about this before, but the isolation of modern society never ceases to amaze me. Never in history has it been so easy for people to connect to each other - the internet, blogs, cell phones, email - and yet I truly feel that people are more alone now than they have ever been. We use the impersonal mediums of our time to stay at arm's length from each other, then claim that we have all these friendships.

What is even sadder to me is that I see this in the church more and more. Every sunday 2,000 people come to worship services at my church. Many of them come alone. And they sit alone. they worship alone. they leave alone. And we let them. there are so many people we assume everyone must have someone, but that's not the case. And I hurt for those people, because it wasn't all that long ago in my life that I was one of them. I attended my church for years by myself, sitting on the aisle, living in the fringes of faith, and feeling all alone with people all around me. And, there are still some times when i still feel that isolation, that not knowing where I fit and how to make my way into new friendships and groups. I think in so many ways what the song above says is true. It's so easy to hide your hurt and loneliness when you're with people. Again, take church - it's so easy to hide in the crowd of 2,000 other 'lonely' people. And, sadly, it's way too easy to be lonely in a crowd. It's easy to be lonely in the middle of people. We create isolation by not pursuing authentic relationships. We create isolation by not seeing beyond ourselves and into the world. We create our own lonely places to hide where we are most visible.

The challenge of faith, and, ultimately, the challenge of the church, is to break down those walls of isolation that people create. It's a hard challenge, because it's hard to change the cultural norms of society and make it easy for people to be open in an isolating age. So, how do we make the shift? I'm honestly not sure. I don't know how the church can effectively reach out to the people that are being all alone together in the same building every Sunday. but, i do know that it starts with me being more open. it starts with the people i know that feel the same cultural shift happening under the name of 'church' reaching out and changing who they are so they can more accurately reflect who Jesus is - the end of the self-imposed isolation we've all created for ourselves.

Hilarious!

So, my super amazing bestest friend Liz got Eric, TimT, Tim, and myself tickets to see "Spamalot" on Wednesday night in Indianapolis. I went not knowing what to expect. I have seen the Monty Python Holy Grail movie a few times...sometimes I think it's funny, sometimes it just annoys the crap out of me :) So, I wasn't sure what I would think about the whole thing...but, in a word...

HILARIOUS!

I don't know that I have ever laughed quite that hard at a musical. Sure, there has been a lot of humor in some of the things that I've seen - Hairspray, The Producers - but none have had moments where I almost cried I was laughing so hard. The completely out of left field moments of just...idiocy...were wonderful.

And, because I tend to gravitate towards musicals that are a little deeper and involve a lot of emotional attachment, it was refreshing to just go to the show and laugh and enjoy myself!

Ponderings & Promises

Can I just tell you how tired I am of always being tired? I'm not sure when my life got so crazy - I'm not sure when looking at my calendar made me exhausted. I think it was sometime before all the wedding planning started! After almost seven wonderful months of marriage, I thought life would slow down. Wow, was I wrong! I know I am involved in more and doing more than I have for a long time. I know that I have friends and family and commitments that are keeping me busy. I know, for some reason, my job is just insane right now. But, all that aside, I am TIRED of being TIRED. I think I need a weekend where I can not get out of my pajamas, sleep for 20 hours straight, and just be a bum. Maybe I'll schedule that for sometime in 2008!

I know it sounds like I'm complaining, and I am a little, but I do have to admit that it is mostly good things that are taking up my waking hours. Challenges and new learning opportunities at work, time with Tim and my family, roadtrips to Chicago and Jasper, involvement in new ministries and meeting new people and making new friends, extra jobs to help make some extra money...it's all good stuff, there's just a lot of it.

I just got back from spending all day at a financial practices for non-profits lecture in Noblesville. Traffic was insane and I just walked in the door after leaving at 7:00am this morning. It was a good day and I learned a lot and have a lot to think about, but wow, I am so not an accountant! Lately I've been thinking I could become an accountant, that I could even enjoy it...but today I realized that tax law is still boring to me and, while it would be challenging, I don't think I would be happy for any length of time. Good to know before I make some random career move! (and to those of you reading this who know where I work and what I do for a living, no, I am NOT planning on leaving any time soon...just keeping my options open and trying to remember to look toward the future).

This weekend I am planning on relaxing, doing some freelance work, and spending time with the man I love. Sounds like a great plan to me.