100 Things about me…

I think this is going to be a lot harder than I really thought…


100. I am terrified of going blind.
99. Sometimes when God whispers, I hear Him more clearly than when He yells.
98. Living with Liz and her billion shoes and clothes is still one of my favorite college memories.
97. I love strawberry Ice Cream.
96. I thought the love I feel for Tim would never happen.
95. I wanted to cry when the Care Bears came back out. I like them that much.
94. My mom is one of my best friends. I hope someday I’ll be ½ the woman she is.
93. She also makes the best chocolate chip cookies in the world.
92. I’m proud of the fact that Agape, my fish, has been alive since September.
91. Sometime during my 1st year of college, I became a bit of a neat-freak.
90. There is a little of Monica from “Friends” in me—I actually LIKE to organize.
89. “The Wonder Years” will always be one of my favorite TV shows.
88. My dad’s death when I was 17 changed my life forever. I miss him like crazy.
87. I’m more insecure than anyone will ever know.
86. I think a clear, starry night is the most romantic thing in the world.
85. I thought I understood what love felt like—and then I met Tim.
84. I have a permanent watch line on my left hand.
83. My step-dad has never treated me like a step-child. I love you, Harry.
82. I love everything about airplanes and flight. Call me a nerd, I’m okay with that.
81. I lived on stage in High School. I would love to do it again.
80. I would much rather make other people happy than be happy myself.
79. I learn something new about myself every day.
78. “Newsies” is the best live-action Disney musical I’ve ever seen.
77. I can quote most of “The Princess Bride” word for word.
76. I didn’t want to watch “Singing in the Rain” when my mom and Harry brought it home the first time. Now it’s one of my favorite movies.
75. I want to be a writer, and know I have a story—but lack discipline.
74. I actually like to fish.
73. I actually do not like to drive.
72. “Harold and the Purple Crayon” taught me the power of imagination.
71. I love to travel, but I also love to come home.
70. Sitting in silence is perfectly fine with me.
69. I wouldn’t mind a bit if Liz and Jenny woke me up in the middle of the night laughing at ALF again.
68. Sarcasm is a gift that not everyone was given.
67. My roommate has been my best friend for most of my life.
66. It frustrates me when people I know and love are hurting and I can’t make it better.
65. I have an unusually close relationship with my 12 year old brother. He ROCKS and I think he’s amazing. He’s also 12 years younger than me.
64. I was scared of my house growing up. Not my family. The actual building.
63. I think the final monologue of “Our Town” is one of the best pieces of theatre ever written.
62. I read Shakespeare for fun.
61. My fingernails are never all the same length.
60. I rarely leave home without a book.
59. “The Giver” is one of my favorite books. You have to read it to understand why.
58. I love to listen to the elderly tell their stories.
57. Sometimes I get jealous when my friends do things without me. It’s bad, but it’s who I am.
56. Billy Joel is still my favorite singer.
55. I love to give and receive hugs.
54. Being in the arms of someone you love and who loves you is the best feeling in the world.
53. I’m 24 and I still enjoy going on family vacations—with my family.
52. My aunt Barb is crazy. At least she’s aware of it 
51. New things, places, and situations scare me.
50. Sometimes I’m afraid of letting people see the real me.
49. I love to play cards with my mom.
48. New York City is one of my favorite places in the world.
47. There isn’t a song in RENT that doesn’t remind me of college.
46. I can count my close friends on my fingers.
45. Walking through the woods in fall makes me breathe a little deeper.
44. I regret that I’m not as close to my step-mom and my siblings up in Michigan.
43. I used to live in Oklahoma. I really don’t remember much of it, though.
42. My hair is wash-and-go 98% of the time—mostly because I’m lazy.
41. The children’s book departments in Borders and BN are my favorite places to sit and relax.
40. I love to sleep in my big bed.
39. Prof. Linton was by far the most entertaining teacher I had in college…and she didn’t mean to be at all!
38. I always type with my fingers on the right keys.
37. Blue and green are my favorite colors—always have been, always will be.
36. My mom can recite me “The Cat in the Hat” without the book. She’s that cool.
35. I slapped a boy in 5th grade for calling me a not very nice word.
34. I need to meet more people.
33. The grocery store makes me angry. Don’t ask why, I just get frustrated and angry when I’m there.
32. I would love to take a cooking class or 50 and learn how to do it right.
31. My dream is to open a pajama store someday. “A More Comfortable You.”
30. Having my peers give me two theatre awards my Senior year of high school meant the world to me. I still have the awards.
29. I believe that crying is good for the soul sometimes.
28. I’m still finding Toy Story 2 stickers on my stuff from a random moment in college.
27. Mike Dodd will always be one of the most important people in my life, even if we were to never talk again.
26. Annie taught me more about being who I am than anyone else.
25. I believe there is no greater feeling in the world than laughing until you can’t breathe and cry.
24. I still sleep with a stuffed animal on my bed.
23. I hold myself to a higher standard than I would ever dream of holding anyone else.
22. I have a love-hate relationship with thunderstorms.
21. I’ve watched more bad Lifetime movies than I would care to admit-most of them with Rene.
20. “Return to Me” and “Never Been Kissed” are two of my favorite ‘chick flicks.’
19. The dollar theater is my favorite investment.
18. I’m a Christian and I like Harry Potter. It really IS possible.
17. I know God’s dreams for me are bigger than my own, but I still am afraid of failing, so I sit and do nothing instead.
16. I enjoy exercising.
15. I love to scrapbook, but need more money to do it right.
14. I love my church-the people, the worship, the teaching.
13. I get homesick more than I’d like to admit.
12. Most of the time I do not like being alone anymore.
11. I have the petals of every rose Tim has given me.
10. I keep cards from the people I love forever.
9. I’m afraid of my house catching on fire.
8. Iced Tea is my favorite summer-time drink.
7. I love to play miniature golf.
6. I used to cross-stitch a lot. I would like to again.
5. I love homemade Christmas Tree Ornaments.
4. I wear the same jewelry every day.
3. Walking around I.U. with Jennifer was very cathartic for both of us.
2. I worry about things way more than I should…even though I know there is nothing I can do to change them.
1. I am in love in a deep and profound way.

Here are some great pictures of the trip. Two of the girls are being baptized on Sunday. How exciting. God is amazing! You can also check out the Colby webpage here. Trevor and Val are the missionaries we worked with. Cecilia is their daughter and there is a baby on the way.


"For God will do amazing things among you..."

Back Again

Well, there is a good reason that I haven’t blogged for awhile—I’ve been in Honduras. That’s right. Central America. On a mission trip. It was amazing. The hardest thing about coming back from a trip like that is the “How was the trip?” question. It’s the best question, and one that deserves a real answer, but it’s still sooo hard. The easy answer? It was great. Amazing. Unbelievable. Brilliant. Eye-Opening.

I haven’t really ever been surrounded by that kind of poverty. I also have never really felt the things I felt on the trip. There I was, sitting in a country that just a few years ago was devastated by Hurricane Mitch. We’re talking devastated. And now you wouldn’t know unless you were told. These are people that have next to nothing materially, but have everything you could ever want in their hearts. They are happy people. They don’t need all of the things we THINK we need~the stuff. So many people live in houses made of nothing more than sticks and cardboard that aren’t even the size of the room I am in right now as I am writing this. Big families or small, it doesn’t matter. And yet, they are happy and they were excited to see us and wanted to share their lives with us.

It was so beautiful.

We did a little of everything. I think the thing that impacted me most was the eye clinics. Before I left my friend Karen sent me an email talking about the deep truth of giving people sight so that they can really See. It was amazing how many people wanted glasses so that they could read their Bibles. They wanted to read the Bible, and they couldn’t. They wanted to see His words and hear His truth, and we could help with that. There was a woman in a wheelchair. I hadn’t really talked to her the whole day she was there. Then I was walking into the room where we were giving out the glasses and she reached out and grabbed my hand. Now, I didn’t understand much of what she had said to me, but I understood enough to know how grateful she was. She told me we (the team) were all gifts from God and we were treasures to her. I leaned down and gave her a hug and I could feel the warmth and strength in her frail arms.

She was beautiful.

The team I went with was amazing. We were all very different and there were a lot of personalities in the room. But, at the end of the day, we all worked together and made sense of our lives together for the eleven days we were together. Paige, Renee, Kim, Kara, Whitney, Megan, Nikki, Gail, Stephanie, Laura, Tim, Joel, Brad, Kevin, Doug, and Al…

You are beautiful.

The whole time I was in Honduras, I could feel the prayers of the people back home. I could hear my prayers as they went up to Him. I prayed a lot and found a lot of peace. And in return, I could hear God whispering in my heart. I could hear Him saying “I am so proud of you. I love you.” To hear that and to really believe it was amazing.

He is beautiful.

Surely this man was the Son of God!
After Tim and I talked about the movie a little more last night, we both agreed on one thing. One of the most powerful 'lines' was omitted. As Jesus dies on the cross, the Bible says this...

And when the centurion, who stood there in front of Jesus, heard his cry and saw how he died, he said, 'Surely this man was the Son of God.' (Mark 15:39 NIV)

Of the many people Christ encountered on the road to Calvary, of those at the crucifixion, of those that are a part of this story, this man stands out in my mind (as does the criminal on the cross). This soldier had beaten Christ's body, had spit on him, leered at him, and hated him. He watched as he was crucified. He probably drove the nails and forced the crown of thorns on his head. And then there he was, standing on the brink of eternity. The ground shook, the curtain was torn, the Holy of Holies was opened, and everything changed. He looked at the lifeless body of Christ and realized the Truth...

...It wasn't until after the movie that I realized the omission. It wasn't until I was able to process and talk about it a little more that the realization came. Why was this left out? Sure it's just one verse, but how powerful. To be the tormenter...to be the villain, and to realize that you just crucified the Christ...wow. I can't imagine what was going through that man's head. He is there. He knows. Did he repent? Did he believe? Will we see him in heaven? So many questions...

Go here to learn more about the imagery, symbolism, and more from "The Passion of the Christ."

I Will Never Be the Same Again
Well, I did it. I saw the Movie and I don't think I will ever be the same again. This will probably be the shortest blog about the most significant thing because I just don't think words can do it justice. I really don't. I don't think there is anything that will make this make sense to me. I will never understand the anger, the frustration, the brutality. I will never forget the sounds of an angry crowd crying "Crucify Him!" I will never forget the continual, seemingly never-ending walk to the hill. I will never forget the look of someone who knows what they are seeing. I will never forget His impassioned plea "Father Forgive them, for they don't know what they are doing."

I could feel my life ripping into his flesh. I could feel my anger, my sin, my lust, my pride...all of it...tearing through living flesh and exposing bone. I could see in His eyes the love he has for me. The way He was willing to do it; the pain He was willing to endure. I would have refused. I would have listened to the Temptress as she said it wasn't worth it. His resolve, His love, His compassion. There He was, hanging, bruised, and beaten on a cross, and He listened to the cry of a convict hanging beside Him and offered a powerful promise. "I tell you this day you will be with me in paradise."

I saw this movie with two of the most important people in the whole world, my roommate and my boyfriend. I sat in the middle of them, tears streaming down my face, as the Truth unfolded in front of my very eyes. Rene didn't pass out, she watched with her hoodie covering her mouth, hiding her tears. She sat silent and watched with open eyes. Tim sat still at first, then slowly began sinking into his chair, tears streaming down his face, as well. I could feel the haggard breath of a person muffling their tears as he watched. I could feel his grip tighten on my hand. I will be forever grateful that I experienced this film (for it is something you experience, not something you just watch) with him. It is no secret that I love him. That his very presence in my life is one of the biggest blessings I ever have been given...it is no secret that I dream of spending my life wrapped in the safety of his arms, and it is no secret that I truly believe it will happen. And somehow, during this movie, I grew even closer to him. No words were said, no words were needed. He is the love of my earthly heart, second only to the One who blessed us with this relationship from the beginning.

I will never be the same again. I will never forget. Communion will never be just part of my Sunday morning ritual.

I do believe, I do believe
In the promise of His love
I do believe, I do believe
in His kingdom come

I do believe, I do believe
He promises me more
I do believe, I do believe
than this world has in store

I do believe, I do believe
that love will overcome
I do believe, I do believe
In the One sent from above

I do believe, I do believe
I am forever changed
I do believe, I do believe
My heart is no longer in chains